The weather keeps her

This is the final Yoon Yong poem. I am in the process of writing a proper analysis/epilogue about the poem, as requested by a couple of loyal readers. I hope to have it done by next week.

Thank you for reading these poems. If anyone who would like these poems sent to them as a whole, email me at danielpaulmarshall85@gmail.com & I’ll sort this out for you.

 The weather keeps her 
 
…As the clouds tear open like a nail ripping open a vinyl-house
the rain in sheets colour the landscape grey
 
—graphite thatching in the sketches Sarang makes.
Quickly the fields flood | biblical waters spewing onto the road
 
—from nowhere a mudslide crashes through a wall
colliding with her flank flipping the car into a farm’s culvert.
 
She recovers herself | wipes blood from her lip
& manages to wriggle free of her seat belt
 
stumbling into the knee deep mud | the reservoir of debris
that was the road—her hands cushioning her body's collision
 
with the mud which without her knowing | steals her wedding ring |
she is stranded
 
                          — why do I feel so free?...
                          

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8 Comments

  1. This is a monumentally stunning piece of work. I’m wondering whether in fact the orphaned line works, or if it were included in the truncated line would it clothe its punch in a more subtle glove. But, oh brother!

  2. I deliberated, but I felt that the loop needed to be broken: the ring is lost she is out the loop, but the elipsis is still there, a staggering doubt is there, inexorably at the limits of fate looking in & patient. For now her weather has materialized outwardly to give her a hand making the decision. The “orphaned line” is this.
    I think if I’d used this anywhere in the poem it wouldn’t impact, but seeing as it is the only time, it becomes a statement.
    Thanks again for reading these. You’ve given me confidence to write fictional, narrative poetry. There’ll be more, but a new character.

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